Wednesday, July 11, 2012

We had a sand volleyball game last night at New Town. The team we played was deaf. One of our subs is an ASL interpreter, so it worked out. She kept signing to them "I'm horrible," and "stop serving to me" and they kept laughing. It was a fun game, and we actually won.

I picked Allison up for breakfast this morning at First Watch (I got a pancake with bacon and cheddar in it) and then we went to Joann's for some fabric and dye. I'm going to make these ponytail holders that don't break your hair off, and they're cute too. My yoga teacher gave me one, and it's the only one I use. I used to lose ponytail holders left and right, but I've had this one for a few months. It's nice just having one instead of 38.

Allison and I talked about an article she read claiming that sharing your goals with people tricks your brain into thinking you've accomplished them already because of the praise one typically gets for setting the goals in the first place. I totally believe it, but I think it's good to have three people to share them with. Or just one. Or you can just blog them for the world :) Either way, she shared a goal and I said, "That's awesome... I mean, it's whatever." No praise for her!

Something I've been realizing is that I think I'm always right and that other people are stupid. Also, I am cynical. It makes me sad. I feel like it's too late to be meek and mild, because I'm already not. It's like once you cook a burger you can't make it raw again (but I guess you can throw it away and just eat vegetables). Maybe I can trick my brain. Maybe if I fake it, my brain will believe me and I'll just start thinking sweetly about everyone. I caught myself trying to "nicely" point out someone's  flawed thinking in a manipulative way. Then I kept justifying myself... until finally I had to just apologize.

I know it's not true. I don't have to fake it. Jesus is making all things new, and he can uncook my burger heart.

I'm a blessed little kid.

2 comments:

  1. Wow. Your burger heart.
    Well, I think it might be a little like the Happiness Project book said, where you go ahead and smile when you don't feel like it, and then you start to feel like it. Tell yourself that person is precious, has good ideas...
    Actually, I know this is so much the Sunday school answer, but praying for the "stupid" person really helps you to love them.
    Hey, tell me how to make those ponytail holders. Is it a scrunchy?

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  2. Gosh, nice analogy. I bet God can make you into raw meet and not make you be a vegetarian.
    I miss sand volleyball!

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